Tears, Chillies, and a Bowl of Pad Thai

No Pad Thai on the menu, but it’s always on our minds

I’m always craving Pad Thai, it’s one of those dishes I could eat on repeat - but getting it right is another story entirely.

One of the kindest things Mattie ever did for me was to go and work in one of the best Thai kitchens in London. To this day, he’ll tell you it was one of the hardest restaurants he’s ever worked in. Not because the kitchen was chaotic - quite the opposite - but because the standards were so relentlessly high. They worked only with the best produce and there was no cutting corners when it came to technique.

Part of the daily mise en place involved shredding endless lime leaves with a cleaver sharp enough to slice through thought. So many that blisters bloomed across his hands, only to be rubbed raw again while mincing lemongrass, then salted with the juice of countless limes. Ouch!!

If you think the salad section is the easy station in most kitchens, think again. Here, the Som Tam station was the real test. Every portion pounded to order, tasted, adjusted, and tasted again until it hit the exact balance of sweet, sour, salty, spicy - addictive, tear-inducing perfection.

I still dream about one of their deep-fried salads - delicate herbs, dipped in a batter laced with limestone water, fried until shatteringly crisp and tossed in a dressing that walked the tightrope between sweet, spicy, and lip-puckeringly sharp. You’d burn your mouth, cool it with jasmine tea, and then go right back in for another bite, knowing full well there was a lethal birds-eye chilli lurking in the mix.

Mattie lasted just under a year in that kitchen, and true to form, made a whole group of friends for life. That’s the thing about him, people love working with Mattie. In fact, Mattie’s former boss at the Thai, Toni, is actually joining us for the opening of Gina - staying for four months before heading back to New Zealand. We’re not just excited for the staff meals (though I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t counting the days) but because Toni’s a real pro when it comes to openings and systems.

I am not a Thai food expert, it’s a cuisine i’d love to explore even further someday, it is hands-down one of my favourite cuisines. When I first started seeing Mattie, back when he was living in Finchley, one of our greatest shared joys was ordering from a little spot down the road called Pandan. The crab and mango Pad Thai was our go-to - the kind of dish you’ll take a detour off the A406 for.

It was also one of Gina’s favourites. She loved Thai food and the restaurant where Mattie worked was one of her top spots in London. Every year on the anniversary of her passing, we gather there. The same table, the same menu, the same tears: a bittersweet ritual of birds-eye chillies and memories.

Now, this particular restaurant never served Pad Thai. It wasn’t that kind of place. But Mattie’s time there gave him a good base level understanding of Thai ingredients - how to treat them properly, how to balance their flavours. So while this recipe might not be a perfect, Bangkok-street-stall Pad Thai, it’s the one we make at home when the craving hits.

Life’s hectic. We don’t always have time to chase down every last ingredient and that’s ok. Mattie’s version of Pad Thai honours the essence of the dish without demanding perfection. No preserved radish (pickled onion in this case!), no dried shrimp just thoughtful swaps and a deep respect for balance. It’s a reminder that cooking at home doesn’t have to be exact to be beautiful. Sometimes, good enough is great especially when it’s made with care.

It’s simple, adaptable, and a proper midweek dinner hero. Dial the chillies up or down, as you like, eat it as soon as it’s served and I promise, it’s deeply, deeply satisfying.

Pad Thai

Serves: 2

Time: 30 minutes

Equipment: Frying pan or wok